Contemplating The Problems Of A Third World Hellhole Part 1

I live in Bangladesh. Bangladesh is a country like no other. It is the world's largest river delta, or in other words made entirely of stuff the other countries didn't want and dumped in their rivers. It is surrounded by evil India (by surrounded I mean we are located in India's asscrack) and shares a small border with Myanmar who isn't so much evil as largely unpleasant. The entire region is displayed in the below picture.

Banglaadesh is incredibly overpopulated. It is so overpopulated that not everyone fits in the country and must resort to standing on top of another person. Sort of like the below picture but uglier. I mean, if your neighbor on the floor above is being a loud asshole you don’t need to poke your roof with a broomstick, all you would need to do is swear at the person standing on top of you and tell him/her to pass it on in a session of Chinese Whisper. With any luck they will improve on your whispered abuse to make sure your intended message gets through.

We have 160 million people in Bangladesh and countless others underwater in the Evil Bay of Tsunamis. Bangladesh is the world's largest importer of Natural Disasters. Tsunamis, Hurricanes, Cyclones, Thunderstorms, Floods, Earthquakes (although if you see the previous posts you may realize that it may be more man made than you think). You name it and the chances are that we are plagued by it.

But back to the overpopulation. Bangladeshi's are dumb. They think just because they're poor they shouldn't buy condoms. Well what they don't understand is that by wearing protection they save costs in the long run. But they're idiots so nothing to do there. Maybe free condoms are the answer.

It doesn't help that Bangladeshi society is so conservative that people often mistake women for ninjas.(I'm not saying they aren't).

Say about 20 to 25 years ago, we had a lot less ninjas in Bangladesh; this is inversely proportional to the number ninjas in Japan. Back then it was, say 5% of all women, right now its 50%. These gauged figures may be fantastic news to which some religious bearded fellows would say ‘Inshallah/ Mashallah, today the idiots, tomorrow the upper-middle class!’ but to me it’s a doomsday hourglass-cum-time bomb and when the percentage reaches 100 it will be time for the second coming of Jesus and Armageddon shall be upon us. So, assassin or believer? Either ways,they are both several hundred years out of date.

Because of the country's unwavering faith in a book made by a prophet/ lying bastard/ retard, people do not indulge in pre-marital sex. This leads to very horny people. So when people do get married, they go batshit crazy and then BAM all of a sudden they have 10 kids and another 14 on the way. This leads to more people standing on top of you, which in turn leads to reduced average height. Yeah, it’s true; a lot of Bangladeshis are short (Thankfully, I’m not but sadly the same can’t be said for Bad Ideas). Damned human pyramids, you participate in them even once and you’re vertically crippled for life.

This hardly is all the problems that plague the not gay side of Bengal so expect another multiple part post in the near future.

That Guy and Bad Ideas